Hot Flashes + Snowpocalypse 2015= Happy Menopausal Mom

Snow.  I had never thought about it, but “snow” is a four-letter word.  And, typically I don’t like four-letter words, but I happen to love this one! 

I was so excited to hear Sunday night’s weather forecast for Monday: “10-14 inches of snow predicted for Central, KY.” Yay!!  And to top that, record low temperatures will follow the big snow storm, which was named “Octavia” by the way.  That name actually sounds more like a kind, menopausal woman you would invite to dinner rather than a scary snow storm

But, speaking of menopause, as we so often do in this blog, I was watching the “Today Show” Tuesday morning, and they devoted an entire segment to menopause…it even spanned into Hoda and Kathie Lee’s hour.  They were reporting that menopause could last 14 years or more.  They said many factors played a part, and that “The younger you are when it starts, the longer it may last.”  Really?  Really? I began having hot flashes when I was 45.  This could not possibly go into my 60’s…could it?  Well, my husband said he hoped I stayed hot as I got older.  Be careful what you wish for. 

And, for those of us who suffer with our own personal summers year round, does it get any better than a prediction of a massive snow storm?  It’s a menopausal woman’s dream come true!  When a hot flash happens, you just open the door.  Immediate, refreshing relief!

And, I was elated to wake up Monday to find out the prediction was correct.  By Monday evening, we had over a foot of snow in my little hometown of Winchester, KY.  I was like a little girl wanting to build a snowman, but this type of powdery snow would not support an Olaf.  But, that mattered not to me.  I was just happy that with snow came cold temperatures.  I must have opened the door at least 20 times on Monday. 

 No one else in my household seemed to like the snow one bit. Even my dogs did not want to go out in it.  I would open the door for them to go out and do their business, and they would tuck their tails, look at me with those sad puppy dog eyes, and run back into the living room.  Sometimes, I would open the door and they would look out the door, look up at me, look out the door, look up at me, as if to say, “Really, you haven’t shoveled us a place to poop yet?” They REALLY had to go bad before they would venture out.  And, I have to say, watching them try to find a place to actually do their business was hilarious.  They would push themselves through the snow in a circle until there was a decent path, then they would let er rip!  They didn’t seem to appreciate my laughter, but it was entertainment for mom!

My husband acted much like the dogs.  He didn’t want to go out in the snow either.  But, Tuesday came and the cars and drive-way needed clearing.  So, he opened the door, looked outside, looked at me, looked outside, looked at me, and I said, “What, you expect me to do the shoveling?  Get on out there…the dogs had to figure it out too.” 

Today’s forecast is calling for record low temperatures.  I believe one forecast said -10 degrees, and this is not the wind-chill factor, this will be the actual temperature itself.  That makes me happy.  If I feel a personal summer coming on, I will just open winter’s door.  Life is good.

May your hot flashes be mild and your wrinkles even milder.
Kim York

Trapped by the snow: 10 nice things you can do for yourself

It it cold and gray and the snow keeps coming down and piling up. (The picture is a two foot bucket in my backyard.) It seems like a good time to think about some things any Mom can do for herself without much fuss or money. My only expertise in this area is being a Mom like many Moms who doesn't often put taking care of herself on her to do list. 

So here are some thoughts.

1. Take an extra long shower, take a few extra minutes to deep condition your hair and use that fancy soap that seems too good to use everyday.

2. If you have pets. Play with them. Throw the ball for your puppy. Get out the laser pointer out for the cat. It makes them so happy, it will brighten your day. 

3. Watch the first Netflix movie or On Demand movie that catches your eye. No judgement. Not even on yourself. Why is it that the longer you spend trying to pick something to watch the more particular you become because, you know,  you invested so much time in picking. I watched a fairly terrible movie earlier today. All the way through. I'll admit it. When I'm done here, I'm tuning into Hallmark I'm really hoping for an Ed Asner cameo and the main female character being or becoming a chef.

4. As Hallmark commercials keep reminding me as we get older we get drier.  Splurge a little on some deep moisturizing lotion and keep it on within arms reach or your favorite chair. (That's what they are talking about in the commercials, right? Dry skin?) Also, a tube of Chap Stick or Blistex should always be on hand.

6. Invest a little money in a good pillow or two. How much time do you spend in bed? How important is sleep? You don't have to go broke. Check out Big Lots or Overstock.com for good deals or use the many discounts offered by Kohls.

7. Hold on, I'm about to get all Zen-y but celebrate the good things you've done today,  the ways you have loved people in the right way and the times you have been kind just because it was the thing to do. I know I can dwell too long on the many, many things that have gone wrong.

8. Tell somebody who is important to you that you are glad they are in your life. It will help the both of you.

9. Write something just for yourself. It doesn't have to poetic or a work of great fiction just put your fingers to the keyboard or a pen to paper to organize and get out some thoughts. If you are like me, the unbridled and cluttered brain can get very noisy place.

10. Stand up for yourself but without malice. If you get pushed stand firm and hold your ground but try to do it for yourself not out of spite. If you figure out how to do that, please let me know. If I master that, you'll be the first to know.

Shout out to Poland, one of 14 countries and counting where we've reached Menopausal Moms. Menopause is universal!

Mary M.

Movie remakes are making me feel old!

I can actually say I watched the original “Star Wars” movie at the Weddington Theater in Pikeville, Kentucky, in late May of 1977.  I am sure my children, who are anxiously awaiting the release of the newest movie in what is now the third trilogy, “Star Wars: The Force Awakens,” must think I am ancient!

I probably am.

That movie was released at a good time for my family.  In April of that year, our home was swept away in a horrific flood.  We lost all of our family pictures, home movies…and everything else we possessed, and we were living in a mobile home provided to us by HUD.

 

But, for that one night, we were immersed in battle with the Rebel Alliance against the Galactic Empire and their terrifying space station, the “Death Star.”  I so wanted to be like Princess Leia, and of course my brothers wanted to be Luke Skywalker and Han Solo.  And, for a few years following the movie, their bedroom paid homage to the film.  There were Star Wars curtains, blankets, lightsabers,  and toys everywhere!  Some of the items were quite scary to see at night. Can you say “Chewbacca?”

What is making me so nostalgic you ask?  Well, I watched a trailer for a movie remake that will hit theaters this year, “Poltergeist.”  I simply could not believe the movie was old enough to have a remake.  But, I saw this movie when I was dating my first husband, in 1982.  That was almost 33 years ago.  #ThatCannotBeRight

And, I freakin’ LOVED this movie!  But, my experience watching this movie was most likely scarier than most.  Why?  Because we were watching the movie at the Huntington Mall in West Virginia and a tornado came through.  It knocked the power out in the theater, and the theater went black during the “clown under the bed” scene.  I just about peed my pants!  And yes, I screamed like the girl I was!  And, no, there were no cellphones back then to light up the place.  Of course, when you actually need the guy who kept walking through with the flashlight to make sure you weren’t smuggling in food, he was nowhere to be found!

When the movie came back on, my heart was racing out of my chest.  There was no way I could finish the movie at that point, or so I thought.  We started to exit the theater, and I kept watching the Freeling family search for Carol Anne, as I was walking out.  We decided to sit in the back row and watch a few more minutes, just to make sure Carol Anne was ok.  But, she wasn’t, and that was all it took to reel us back in.  I was so glad we stayed.  And, the whole experience gave new meaning to the phrase, “Go into the Light, there is peace and serenity in the light.”  There was almost no light for Carol Anne to walk into.  

I watched the trailer for the new “Poltergeist” movie, and the first thing I noticed was cellphones.  Technology will most likely add a whole new edge.   Just think, with the new 3D TVs out, Carol Anne shouldn’t have an issue with a fuzzy screen.  And, the messages from the dead should come through loud and clear!  Hopefully, this Freeling family will have surround sound!

After watching the “Poltergeist” trailer, I began to think about all of the remakes that have been coming out lately.  And, it made me think about some of the remakes of great movies I watched as a young woman.  They were new to me because I was too young to remember the originals.

 

One such movie is “Cape Fear.”  When I saw “Cape Fear” in 1991, I remember thinking, “It’s hard to believe the original movie was made in 1962…two years before I was even born.  That was a long time ago!”  But, it was actually only 29 years earlier.  That wasn’t even as many years as there is between the “Poltergeist” movies.

 

So, to see all of the movie remakes coming out lately and knowing I watched the originals when I was a young adult, really makes me feel my age.  “Ghostbusters” is even being remade.  Has it been that long since we heard Ray Parker, Jr., sing, “Who ya gonna call?“

And, was it really that long ago that we heard Sissy Spacek ask, “Why didn’t you tell me momma?”

I guess it was.

 

Time goes by so fast anymore.  I fear closing my eyes and hearing the remake of “Fifty Shades of Grey” is coming out.   But, for now, I am not too old to consider watching the original on Valentine’s Day! #UhOh

May your hot flashes be mild and your wrinkles even milder!

Kim York

I’m not ready for Depends…yet.

It seems my cookies have betrayed me. 

No, not Chips Ahoy cookies.  It’s those dang cookies within our computers that make note of everything we search  online. 

They have divulged the fact I, Kim York,  am 50 years old to the entire internet world. 

Now, when I open my email, not only do I have emails from companies who cater to people 50 years and older, but all of the advertisements surrounding my email inbox are also for products for people 50+.  UGH!

It’s as if, you turn 50, and you no longer buy any of the products you purchased when you were 49.  I do not need Depends undergarments, yet!  I can still wear my thongs as long as I choose.  Ok, I may not wear thongs, but I could if I wanted too!

And, reverse mortgages…really?  I am still working hard every day and I will have my mortgage paid off well before I retire.  Oh, and that’s another thing…AARP!  It’s like they stalk you when you turn 50.  AARP has life, auto, home and travel benefits.  I know because I receive mail from them every single day.  I am sure the postal service will never go out of business as long as AARP is mailing out information.

Then there is life insurance…yes, we must not leave our families in a situation where they would have to pay for our burial.  And, it is detrimental that I buy more now because the end is near.  It’s like a preacher staring you right in the eye stressing the possibility of eternal damnation, hell fire and brimstone if you do not have hundreds of thousands of dollars to leave behind.  I just want to be cremated, or possibly have my body donated to science. 

Turning 50 also means we must be in need of hearing devices.  “Hear what you have been missing.”  That is what all of the advertisements say.  Maybe I don’t want to hear what others have to say?  Maybe I would just assume be left alone!  Take for instance listening to the news, it is so depressing!  It’s never good.  Never.  It’s always bad.  Always. 

The most ironic part of the advertisements are the celebrities who advertise them.  Really, Lisa Rinna in her red carpet dress wearing Depends Undergarments??  Really?  Oh my goodness, if Lisa wears them, I have got to have them!  They will look great under my skinny jeans! 

But, I guess the most embarrassing advertisements are those for products like Viagra or Cialis.  They actually use older people for these commercials, but they always make the situations just a little creepy.  How often do you see two people in bathtubs at the ocean?  And really…they are in separate bathtubs? They need a better understanding of how things work before they take any medication, period!  Just creepy!

As much as I love cookies, my internet cookies have got to go! 
Bring on the Chips Ahoy!

May your hot flashes be mild and your wrinkles even milder.
Kim York

A big 'ole Nerd, I applied to college, again. What will you tackle?

I just applied to college. 

Not just regular college.  Nope, I applied to a really fancy college for a chance to be a "fellow" and study stuff not for grades but because I want to. If they pick me, send prayers and vibes my way, they'll pay me to think big thoughts about journalism and maybe learn how to sculpt and eat some really good clam chaw-dah

In my current job in a ever-shrinking newsroom I sometimes don't have time for thoughts at all.

The idea of the fellowship makes me giddy. Because, here it is, I'm a big ole Nerd.

Yep, I get excited at USB drive filled with documents because I figure there is something in there that is exactly what I am looking for. I learned recently of a mythical creature called a data concierge who can help me find specific healthcare statistics and it almost took my breath away.  I found a research paper on wildly varying outcomes among Medicare patient depending on not on the benefit they received but how the state where they lived decided to allot it. It made me audibly go "ohhhhh."

I never particularly thought of myself as nerdy but I never thought it was a bad thing. Honestly, because of particular quirks of my nature, I don't want to seem too invested in anything. Maybe that's why I have a job where I learn a lot about a lot of things. But now at 50 I suddenly want to go deep.

On Thursday I spent eight hours listening to health policy discussion as it relates to the Affordable Care Act. Did you know Wal-Mart is going in to the doctoring business in a big way? Yep, thousands full scale doctor's offices are going into Wal-Mart. Employees can go for $4. You can go for $40. They'll only take cash. If you watch House of Cards you may join me in wondering if Sam Walton is the reason we have the Affordable Care Act at all. (If you don't you should watch House of Cards)

Anyway, I suppose the bigger point is this. I was shaking when I pushed the submit button on my application. Honestly, I had tears in my eyes.

I haven't worked as hard on something for myself if a very long time. It involved all kinds of things I find uncomfortable. Promoting myself. Asking people for help. Asking people to say nice things about me via recommendations.

But it was a really good process for me and whether or not I'll be having "chaw-da" I'm glad I did it. It helped me see I've done some really good work. I've made a difference in some lives.  Over the years I've actually learned a lot.

So here is my challenge to you, my Menopausal Friends, find something to do just for yourself, something that makes you a little bit afraid. Whatever it is. It might be learning how to paint or driving a race care or taking up belly dancing or applying for college. Just do it. And let me know when you do.

Shout Out! Yeah to our one  reader in the Bahamas! A Menopausal Mon?

Loading in for the Snow: Snowpocalypse Edition

Biscuits.

If you're from the South you know that when snow is coming you load in biscuits.

My Super Kroger on Sunday was literally out of biscuits.
The whole freezer case was empty. 

I suppose to the purist there were the makings of biscuits in the baking aisle but who has the time?

And the reason I am writing this post is that I am curious about the things people grab on their way home when they feel like they are going to be trapped by snow.

I suppose that my Mamaw made biscuits for breakfast every morning. My Mom did not. I certainly don't. I provide Cliffs Bars or Pop Tarts. That's on a good day. On a bad day it's "here's a dollar for sausage pancake on a stick at school" and "there's half a bottle of water in the back of the car, oh wait, maybe Mountain Dew..."   

What about snow makes people biscuit crazy?

If I had to pick a breakfast bread to be trapped with on a snow day, I'd go for cinnamon rolls or a nice blueberry scone.
Are people, especially Moms, giving into peer pressure to appear more responsible?

Are they worried someon in the check out aisle will spy their cart in th check out aisle....we all know we judge....and think "cinnamon rolls, scones....where are the biscuits? What kind of mother doesn't get snow biscuits?"

The run on milk is equally weird to me. Are people suddenly jonesing for milk? We made snow cream when I was little and I loved it but a gallon of milk would make, what, 5 gallons of snow cream? 

Does falling snow raise the need for calcium in your blood?

I'll admit I am generally ill prepared to survive lengthy entrapment in my house.
If I honestly made a list of things I really need to survive it would be say cheese, pasta, sauce, pizza, cheese, almond milk and cheese. And the number for Chinese delivery .

That covers the basics. 

I suppose as a Menopausal Moms would add wine and chocolate. 

Really, check out judgement aside, what do you load in for a Snow Day?

And today's shout out goes to our readers in Malta. Or maybe reader. Either way MALTA!

Merry Mushy Christmas!

Maybe it’s my menopausal emotional mood swings?

Maybe it's because I turned 50!

Maybe it is celebrating Christmas without my children all together this year? 

Maybe it’s the fact my dad has been gone a year this month, and I want to hug him so much?  I would love to hear him say, “Hey Sissy,” just one more time. 

Maybe it is all of the heart-wrenching CHRISTmas videos I am seeing on Facebook?  I don’t know what is doing this to me?  But, I am a mushy mess!  Christmas is such an emotional time. 

Last week, I was taking pictures at our church of Santa reading the story of Christ’s birth to the children.  Santa asked the children if they knew the true meaning of Christmas, and one little boy stood up and yelled, “Jesus!”  Wow!  Out of the mouths of babes!  The church erupted in clapping.  He brought a big smile to my face.

Later in the service, the children went downstairs to celebrate the birthday of Jesus.  They were gathered around a table playing with various toys.  But, while they were doing this, they were singing, “Happy birthday Jesus…I’m so glad it’s Christmas.”  (If you don’t know the song, check the link below.)  I couldn’t help but tear up.  And as a photographer, it is quite difficult to take pictures while boo-hooing like a toddler who just got time-out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B44dPW08TGg

This has been my emotional rollercoaster for the last 7 days…up and down.  One minute I am laughing hysterically, and the next I’m sobbing into what is now the third box of Kleenex I have opened this week.

Tears, however, are not always a bad thing.  The first video I watched on Facebook this morning was of children who were given an early Christmas present.  This present was their father returning home from serving overseas.  I cried like a baby!  But, those tears were happy tears.  Those children were crying too, but everyone involved was happy.

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=10203039855222069&set=vb.1375884238&type=2&theater

The second video I watched this morning was the story of a young mother who lost her husband in a car wreck, just 14 weeks after the birth of their son.  The baby was also injured in the wreck, but survived.  The video centered on the mother thanking the hospital staff who saved her son ten years later.  And, it had a happy ending.  But, all I could dwell on was the loss of her young husband.  I cried again, but this time, I was so very sad. 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/12/03/kellie-haddock-mom-thank-you-project_n_6262640.html

Life is full of good and bad things, and maybe God does this on purpose.  We cannot truly appreciate the good things unless we have the bad to compare it to.  2014 taught me this lesson very well.  I lost my father (very end of 2013.)  I had difficulties in my marriage.  I had difficulties with work.  I also injured my back and treatment for this caused my hair to fall out.  It just didn’t seem like it could get much worse. 

But, our oldest daughter, Amanda, got married to an amazing man this year, and we now have a bonus granddaughter to boot.  And, our younger daughter, Ashley, had a documentary, “Tig,” she co-produced, chosen for the Sundance Film Festival for 2015.  Our oldest son, Brad, won two KPA awards for his work in journalism, and our youngest son, Jordan, was hired to work for American Airlines.  I am so proud of our children!  Too obvious?

Along with the good things happening for our children, I was offered a position teaching full-time for a technical college.  This has always been a dream of mine.  And, I renewed my wedding vows to my husband…who just also happens to be my best friend.  We also have a roof over our heads and food for our bodies…many people do not. 

It is truly a good life.  God has blessed me so much!  And, to him I give all glory!

MERRY MUSHY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!

Kim
May your hot flashes be mild and your wrinkles even milder.