Tuesday, March 31, 2015

True Friendship is more than "Likes" on Facebook


March Madness has truly been just that…nail biting games that could possibly provoke heart attacks!  And, anyone who knows me knows I bleed blue. C-A-T-S Cats Cats Cats! 

But, in my own personal madness, I like to have fun on social media with my friends who may not bleed blue…though I find it hard to believe anyone could not support the University of Kentucky Wildcats basketball team!  And, after UK's last game, I know the good Lord above is a Wildcat fan! 
  
 
 
 
 
However, I have to remember to keep this fun with friends I truly know and friends who know me because if you know me, you recognize I would never say anything with the intent to be hurtful.  Recently, I made a big mistake in that regard…and it was a life lesson for me.

What I also have to remember is even though we can stay in touch with people we knew from a previous lifetime (at 50 years of age, it could be several lifetimes ago,) we may not know much about them in the present.  People change…we all do…hopefully! So, even though we accept "friends" on Facebook, we may only be accepting acquaintances, or "old" friends. 

A true friend is so much more than those we find on social media.  For instance, when my dad died 15 months ago, a dear, dear friend dropped everything…took a few days off work to travel with me to my hometown, and supported me throughout the funeral process.  I will never forget that.  But, this sacrifice came from years of supporting each other.  I have always tried to be there for her too.  This kind of support cannot come through Facebook.

And, friends who only want you to support them are not true friends; friendship is a two-way street.  I try to keep this in mind and reach out to my friends when I can.  And, I reach out to them in person…not just through Facebook.  I want them to know I am physically there if they need me.  Let's face it, at my age…and my friend's ages, we may be just a little forgetful.

Another valuable thing about friends is they begin to feel more like family; you want to share everything with them.  Your family becomes their family and vice versa. My wonderful next-door neighbors are like adopted parents.  I love to cook for them and we are all there for each other.  They attended my son's wedding and we will be attending their grand-daughter's wedding in July.  The key is supporting each other. 

Yes, we pray for each other on Facebook, and we "like" each other's posts on Facebook, and these things are amazing!  But, we have to take true support of those close to us further than that.  I would never simply say, "Happy Birthday" on Facebook and expect that to be ok with a true friend.  And, if it is my birthday, I want a real cake…no emoji's on my special day! 

Take a minute to think about your best friend/friends, what do you like most about them?  Do you recipricate those characteristics?  Are you as supportive to that friend as they are to you?  Yes, sometimes life happens and we forget to reach out.  We all have those weeks!  But, we have to reach out!  We never know when that friend may really need us, but feel too lost to ask for support. 

Bottom line...Facebook can be informative when it comes to keeping up with family and friends, but do not let that be the catalyst to any true friendship.  Facebook is nothing in comparison to real faces. 
Tell me about the relationship/s you have with your besties.  Is it more than social media?  Are you, like me at times, guilty of forgetting to make time for those close to us?  I am making it a priority in my life to make sure I see my friend's faces more than I see friends on Facebook.

May your hot flashes be mild and your wrinkles even milder.
Kim York

 

 

 

 

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