Monday, April 13, 2015
I'm going to Harvard
I'm going to Harvard. At least for a visit. It may be a 24 hour turn around trip or it could be that and 9 months of studying in Cambridge.
I few months ago I wrote about trying something new and reaching for things that seem unlikely or unobtainable
I said this at the time.
"I was shaking when I pushed the submit button on my application. Honestly, I had tears in my eyes.
I haven't worked as hard on something for myself if a very long time. It involved all kinds of things I find uncomfortable. Promoting myself. Asking people for help. Asking people to say nice things about me via recommendations."
What I didn't say was what, exactly, I was applying for or where. I was vague as to what I was doing.....I was kind of embarrassed to be honest. I was worried people might read it and say "Who does she think she is?" or "Has menopause made her delusional?"
There are lingering whispers of those very ideas still murmuring in my head. That's one reason I am writing about this. I actually need to practice putting the whole idea of me at Harvard out into the world and into my brain so it doesn't seem so crazy and farfetched when I sit in front of a panel of people in 10 days and try to convince them that I am worthy of the title of Nieman Fellow.
I may start trying to drop the hallowed name randomly into every day conversation:
In the drive thru line: "Yes, I would like ketchup with my fries...and I'm interviewing at Harvard."
At the dog park: "It is a beautiful day, I hear Harvard Square is also beautiful."
During any University of Kentucky sports discussion: "Those C-A-T-S will do it next March, they'll even beat Harvard."
Here's the people I will be interviewing with won't believe me worthy such an awesome opportunity if I don't believe in myself.
That goes true not only for my dream of Harvard but everything thing that's worth trying for and having. Seeking a dream takes courage and faith but, mostly, it takes daring to embrace that you have a dream at all.
As Moms, we've often been so rightly focused on our kids or just getting the laundry done and the crock pot filled (and turned on which is where I often fail) we've forgotten how to think big or as the years have gone on we may think of what we were once like or the dreams we once had.
But while there is life there is hope. And I am going to enjoy every minute of the trip and the interview and am planning to at least get some good clam chowder.
What's your seemingly unobtainable goal? What can you do to reach for it today?
Shout out to Russia. Yes, Menopause is Universal.
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